Erev Shabbat Vayiqra/Zakhor
Queen Esther Denounces the Evil Haman the Agagite, Son of Amalek! |
by Rabbi Ephraim Sprecher | first published here
Of all the abilities that human
beings possess, perhaps none is as mysterious as our talent for
compartmentalization. Each of us is multiple people, and different ones emerge
in different circumstances and relationships.
If we can never fully know somebody,
it's not simply because his exterior does not match his interior. It's because
we have so many chambers inside, and some are more hidden than others, even
from the person himself. As the radio program of yesteryear called “The Shadow”
stated, “Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of man?”
Thus, even mild mannered people,
including me, lose their temper and get angry on occasion. Is there a magic
formula to control and manage our anger?
Last week the OU Israel Center
showed the film Ground-Hog Day. It’s about a guy that is stuck in a Time Warp.
This person keeps re-living the SAME day over and over again. He keeps
repeating the same mistakes of the past.
I can identify with the Bill Murray
character in the film. When I am having a Bad Hair Day, I tell myself, “I won’t
become upset and angry.” And then, BOOM - It’s Ground-Hog Day all over again!
The Talmud in Shabbat 105 and
Nedarim 22 state, "When one becomes angry, it is as if he is serving idols."
This seems to be a very extreme and exaggerated statement. How can the Talmud
compare anger to the worst sin of idolatry?
Upon deep reflection, we can
perceive a connection. What really causes anger? When things don’t go my way,
when my plans don’t work out, I get angry. The world is not conforming to my
vision of perfection.
However, since G-D is running and
controlling all events, getting angry is like saying that my version of the
world is better than His! A person in the heat of anger thinks, "If I were
running the world, I wouldn't have all these problems and troubles." The
angry person also thinks, "If I was in charge of the world, I wouldn’t be
messing things up the way G-D is." This angry reaction is a subtle form of
idol worship. Because I am enthroning my intellect and ego and paying homage to
them, instead of to G-d.
What is the best antidote for
anger?
Purim is coming fast. Perhaps the
antidote for anger can be found in the Megillah. “That day Haman went out (from
the King) joyfully and exuberant. But when he noticed Mordechai in the King’s
gate, that Mordechai did not stand up and did not bow before him, Haman was
filled with anger and rage at Mordechai. Yet Haman controlled and restrained
himself and went home. He summoned his friends and his wife Zeresh.” (Esther ch
5)
Why did Haman restrain his fury?
How could he have suppressed and controlled his anger? Rashi explains, because
Haman was afraid to take revenge against Mordechai without explicit permission
from the King.
Here was the wicked and evil Haman “filled
with rage.” His whole being was fury and anger, with murderous intent. Yet he
was able to control and restrain himself from acting impulsively because he
considered its negative consequences. How much more so should we be able to
control OUR angry impulses!
The Mishnah in Avot 2 states, “Know
Who and What is above you! An All Seeing Eye, an attentive and All Listening
Ear, and all your deeds are recorded in The Book.”
When you feel anger coming, stop and say, “Smile, you’re on Candid Camera!”
***When you feel anger coming, stop and say, “Smile, you’re on Candid Camera!”
Happy belated Adar Bet 5779!
More about Amalek (Haman's ancestor) from Myrtle Rising:
The Hidden Viciousness of the Esav/Edom Pig | How to Identify & Overcome the Amalekite Conspiracy
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